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Forums Difficult Feelings and Emotions My Failed Attempts

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    • #16502
      alexia11
      Member

      I just want to start this off by saying I already know people have situations worse then my own but, I couldn’t go any longer without getting some type of advice. I feel as though everything in my life is going terrible and not only that I feel as though its my fault. My father wants to join the military, my mother wants to leave us, and my best friend is asking me permission to let her commit suicide. Of coarse I said no but I know its my fault that she wants to in the first place. I have been helping her through a lot of stuff for the past 4 years but I have also realized she is emotionally abusing me(not intentionally.) The thing is that I told her this and insisted that it be best if we not be personal because we always end up hurting each other. She knows about my struggles and how I have been self-harming* for three years but she never seems to ask how I am doing, she just dumps her problems onto me and assumes I am fine and I have had enough. I don’t know what to do because self conclusion seems tempting.

      *Edited by Youthspace for potentially triggering content

    • #19298
      Youthspace
      Moderator

      Hello Alexia11,

      Welcome to the Youthspace Forum. It seems as if you have a huge amount of stress to deal with right now. You mentioned you’ve been self-harming, and I imagine you’ve been in a pretty dark place these last three years and trying to cope with it all. I am really glad you reached out to us to share what’s going on for you <3.

      Your relationship with your friend sounds pretty complicated. I get the sense you’ve been doing your best to be supportive to her and at the same time, feeling really frustrated with her because she is not doing the same for you. I imagine it would be a very draining relationship for you, when it seems as if your problems don’t matter to her and you are not getting the care and support you need too. It sounds like a lot of pressure for you to be coping with her suicidal feelings on top of everything else you’re going through. Does anyone else know that your friend is feeling suicidal?

      You said “I don’t know what to do because self conclusion seems tempting.” and I am sorry but I am having trouble getting what you meant. Are you saying that you have thoughts of suicide?

      Please know we’re here for you and feel free to chat in as well if you’d like. Our chat service is available any evening between 6:00pm-12:00am PST

      Stay in touch <3

      Youthspace

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